Sex doesn’t sell as much as attention does. True it is. Sex is another form of attention for sure. But without the sly and smooth moves and the charm, sex would just be pure physics like Einstein said. And no one likes pure physics.
My generation I can safely say is lost. Not so much of a judgement call but a sympathy moment for us who are tugged between watching life long romances of our elders blossom post one meeting or no meeting at all to today’s generation that sets clear boundaries on what and how they will connect and make no qualms about it.
After a few hearings over strong and cold coffees across the ages and experiences, there seems to be a generation that has got missed out to be clued in to the way the world around them works. Those in the middle 80s are jumping between the devil and the deep sea and now are tired of their choices not working and just choosing to hang along the cliff, wallowing in self pity.
A few of these stories and the commonality of the issues bears my attention for sure. I was going to describe the stories in details but let me just focus on the gist.
The need of the hour is not to be lonely. Every millenial is struggling to find a firm ground while not being firm himself. How did we get into this mess?
Agreed, most of us have had our hearts broken. Not grasping fully the values in which the world works today. It seems everyone has reached a place where none of the things we learnt, saw or believed in are leading us to anything of a conclusion.
The result is a loneliness and a constant companion of sadness which fills our time and our inability to trust. It is still commendable that we are trying to not be lonely. We are exploring dating apps and reviving old acquaintances in a hope that something familiar and warm embraces us. Yet our distrust is taking over every step we try to take forward.
What would have caused this?
I do. Do I?
The apparent breakdown of the system of marriage. Wedding businesses are booming because feeling like a celebrity with the whole focus on you and the pre wedding shoots and wedding videos like Yashraj films that make us go awww. Today showing the world that my boyfriend loves me is more important than the boyfriend really loving me. Divorce rates are only higher and the duration of the marriage reducing. Indeed where did forever disappear?
Our reliance on the phone for attention, validation and security has destroyed everything around us and it yet makes us feel secure that the phone, social media life will rescue us from everything falling apart in front of us.
We have become so okay with escaping that we are shutting out the things that make us human.
We don’t talk anymore
No. We don’t. Its unnecessary. Takes our attention away from our make believe word inside our small screens which ironically has made us feel like we have a larger than life presence. Its a common sight nowadays to spot lovers sitting across a coffee shop or restaurant happily drowning into their phones. Communication is hard. And attempting is harder so why the effort.
I am listing this. We love to crib and wallow in self pity. We do not want to take responsibility of our lives and be heroes. Its good to post and take some pity along the way. One does not realize that this is temporary and takes away more than giving any. Its tough to be with people when their only response is I am a helpless victim.
Global economy scenario, corona virus, bushfires, floods, changing climate and being under weather being too common across the year – its clear that no one in the human race knows what is coming and take measures for it. A close look at news across the world and it is apparent that every country no matter developed, underdeveloped or developing is grappling to make sense of the changes and predict a way forward. The future is not what it used to be. This puts strain on security in terms of finances and survival and it affects relationships and gives way to doubts whether another emotional investment at this time would be worth it.
Bare my body but don’t try to get inside my mind
A survey of 20 odd people in my circle and outside makes it clear that both the genders regardless of age are open to exploring casual relationships and one night stands but are freaked out by intimacy.
So well, this topic is of deepening interest to me over the years. It starts here. And I wish to help people going through these tough times. Hence starting with Unlabel as a series. Keep tuned.
As for now, this is my 2 cents on this.
You cannot live this one, beautiful life in fear. Let go of the past. Its dead. Stop connecting objective situations to a sad story and stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Get out there and breathe free. Be safe from Corona though.
Love & peace.